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how to improve your EQ
Brian Garland
December 28, 2023
Welcome to The Introverted Path!
Hope everyone has had a relaxing holidays with family and friends. Crazy to think that 2023 is almost over 🙀
I wanted to take a moment to thank everyone that reads this newsletter each week.
What started as a small idea has turned into something I really enjoy doing — I hope y’all are able to get some benefit from it.
I have plenty more planned for 2024.
Slowly but surely, the world will continue to be more educated on introverts.
Today, I am wrapping up writing about EQ (emotional intelligence).
The previous two weeks can be found here and here. I encourage you to start there if you haven’t read those.
In today’s email:
How to improve your EQ
My thoughts
Links to other content I enjoyed this week
Let’s dive in 🤙
How to improve your EQ
The past 2 weeks, I have discussed what EQ is and why it is important.
Having a high EQ allows you to be a better friend, partner, parent, colleague, etc.
And in a world where it is becoming increasingly hard to stand out in the job market, EQ can be a great differential.
So how can we improve our EQ?
Practice active listening
I’ve covered before how listening is an introvert superpower.
When you show you are listening to someone, it sends them a signal you are interested in them.
This helps to build a deeper, more meaningful connection.
Head nods, attentive body language, and asking questions are all great ways to practice active listening.
One of the most important things you can do is not interrupt someone before they finish their thought. Give them space to express their thoughts.
Be genuinely curious about others
Quick story…
Last year I was giving a best man speech for one of my good friends.
I was recalling how when we first moved to Kansas City and started going to social events, I was so impressed with how he acted interested in everyone he talked to.
I would watch him get into deep conversations with people and ask a ton of good questions.
After seeing this go on for a few months, it finally dawned on me.
He made it look so easy because he wasn’t acting interested in others. He genuinely was interested in their story.
Approach these conversations with the mindset that you have something to learn from everyone.
Manage your emotions
Stress is inevitable for everyone.
How we deal with the stress is far more important than trying to avoid it.
When something happens to make us emotional, it is important to take a step back before reacting impulsively.
I can’t tell you how many times I have received a text message or a work email that invoked an emotional response from me.
But instead of replying immediately, I try to give myself some time to process it.
It’s crazy how differently we can view something after giving ourselves space.
Seek out feedback
Feedback is one of those things I think everyone would benefit from, but we don’t ask for it nearly enough.
It can be awkward to ask others for feedback, and even when we bring ourselves to do it, it can be even harder to listen to it.
Having close friends or family members you feel comfortable asking for feedback is a huge advantage.
Most workplaces don’t build up great cultures of giving and receiving feedback, but this is another avenue you can use.
Many times the images we have of ourselves doesn’t line up with how others perceive us, so it can be eye opening to get that feedback.
My thoughts ðŸ’
I am a big advocate in the importance of EQ, so I was glad to write in depth about it.
As knowledge becomes more available via the internet and alternate ways of learning, soft skills will continue to be more in demand.
And as people shift more of their lives online, I can envision a world where less and less people have high EQs.
So hopefully over the last few weeks you were able to learn about EQ and why it is important.
See y’all in 2024!
Links that I enjoyed this week 💥
That’s it for today - hope you enjoyed this week’s newsletter!
Best,
BG